Feb. 20, 2008
My visit with the boys was ok. It was not the overwhelmingly warm welcome that I had hoped, envisioned, and even dreamed of, but I was glad to be there with John and Kevin. I figured, there would need to be some ground that had to be regained, being gone for over 2 weeks. But the constant I had come to rely on, John’s hug and incredible face of joy was not there. He was “normala.” It is a phrase much like “fine” we use in the states, not great, but not bad either. Of course I would want to hear, Papi, I am great now that you are here. But, it could have been worse; and answer of, my day just got worse because you are here, could have been the response, so praise the Lord it wasn’t. What I was reminded, was that God is my constant and not the expression of a child, which can change in a moment. As much as I want to be loved by the boys, He is already loving me with a perfect love, and I need to depend on that, in every circumstances. So, at least if I am not studying to teach my students, I am still studying to teach myself, and listen to the Holy Spirit.
Jenn had a very difficult day yesterday. I am sure she will blog about it, but I will continue to ask that you pray for her strength to parent alone for the next unknown number of days. It was one of those days that the “hits, keep on coming” and you are just fighting to hold your head up while treading water in the deep end of the pool.
Today I am heading back to the orphanage to see the boys. I told you about a paperwork complication with John. They cannot locate information on his mother and must have death certificate or some proof that her rights are terminated in order to file our paperwork for court. G has been all over to try and obtain information, make connections with the right offices, and has received a lot of “run-a-round” and had not a lot of success. Pray for him, that someone will be kind on him/us and have compassion to help out that will satisfy the powers that be. John is aware that it is his paperwork that is holding us up right now, and I am sure is struggling with this. I will try and reassure him today with Lori’s gift of words, that God is in control and that we are not leaving Ukraine without him. This boy is my heart. I love them all, but I can relate so much to his personality, compassion, seriousness. In many ways he is much like I remember myself as a teenager, but he has endured so much more at such a young age. I hope someday, he will crack, let loose, and share his burdens with us. Kevin was very much Kevin yesterday. I got a chance to watch him play basketball for 1 and a half hours, and then spent the last 30 minutes with both boys in the lobby of the orphanage, talking with the help of Valera. George is going to ask permission for me to be able to get a visit this Sat. or Sunday. The orphanage is under quarantine, so we are told. The guards seem unaware of this, and I have seen most of the kids I regularly see, and they all seem fine. No evidence of the flu we are told is “going around”. Hopefully, this will be lifted and I can be invited back for my daily visits. When Jenn comes back to Kiev, we will be moving into the flat at Orphanage 12 for our duration here. Still no word on a court date in Kiev. As soon as we have news, we will let you all know.
God bless you all and we continue to covet your prayers.
Papa Mark
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