Confidence

This morning we woke up to Mama Olya fixing pancakes and coffee and tea. We came out to eat with she and Lori and Oksana and as we talked I asked her about how to handle today. We have never been before someone who is essentially a director of a high level of Government Office like this lady we were to meet with today. This is the equivalent of going to speak to someone who is at the level of a head of state in D.C. One stop below the Minister of the SDA herself. I asked Olya, since I am not from here I do not know how it would be best to approach this lady? Olya said, you speak sincerely but you go in with confidence. You go in sure that you are the mama of these children and you let her know it. You speak with confidence and as if this is already a matter that is basically settled. I mused over what I learned. I would never have gone in that way. I would have gone the way low humble way... what I heard was be honest and humble, but carry yourself in a very sure way. I heard Elise in the back of my head saying, "You just need to sing the Confidence Song from Sound of Music" so for the rest of the day I had that and a few other not so secular but oh so encouraging sound bites playing in my head.

We left here under blue skys and with a good chill in the air. By the time we made it half way to the metro stop I was sure Mark had a pocket full of packing peanuts he was shredding and chunking at me. It was snowing, but it looked like what happens when the popcorn ceiling comes down. Not a normal snow to me it was real clumpy. So we keep going, get to the metro and make it to down town at the bottom of the hill near St. Andrews. We gave in and got a cheese burger at McDonalds (we are all about not doing American food while we are here, and why would we when the Ukrainian stuff is sooooo good!) but it was close and we had time to kill and most important it was warm inside.

We left from there and rode on this cool thing that was like a sky tram up that enormous hill to head up to where you could find St. Andrews. We waited outside the SDA for G. It was like 2:45 when we got there we thought we had to be there around 3. Mark says he knew all the time that it was 3:30 oh how Lori and I had wished we had remembered that because the sky got grey at St Andrews and as we waited for G in our under-dressed attire the snow came across the river and dumped down like a nice heavy rain. It was funny for a few minutes but then it was like wicked when the wind chimed in to beat it into our American brains that we needed to dress a lot better and for any kind of weather change if we feel like it or not. Cheri called about the time that I was thinking man it would be good to get some word right now about if we have a good chance or not. What she said was, well according to S. your boys are ready to come down and explain it the Director themselves! I thought if things don't go well we might find a way to let them!

G. was helping Paula Underwood and Chris finish their final papers at the US Embassy. He hurried in and we went inside to wait our turn to see the Vice Director. Standing in the tiny hall way to the underground again I am thinking to myself, "Lord you go before us in all things, You know what is to come of this, you know these are our children. You know you planned them for our family. Grant us your confidence God." and I hummed I have confidence quietly to myself. Lori (b/c she was a friend and was helping us) was allowed to wait in the hallowed halls of the SDA for us and she learned a lot just from being there and seeing how things went on as people wait on the steps inside for their appointment times. Only facilitators today and "special cases" such as ours.

It was our turn. We step into the room where the two desks meet and make an L and there is a couch and one chair situated across from the only other one in the room. We went in to find a very important & stern looking (now there is a surprise) woman dressed in a green that brought out her eyes. She was serious and G. gave her our papers and the short version of our story. She was not digging what she was hearing and G. got a little uppity with her and chucked out all his credentials to include his passport his POA for us and diploma which she let him know she did not need ( I am learning Russian in context only ) anyway he tells her more of our story and I see she isn't buying it. I pull up the book I made before we left with the pics of us and the kids. She sees I have something and G. says I can show her. I stand up and position myself dead across from her sitting in the seat. She sees pictures of M. asks to see A. then we show her the pics of Z. so she can see that they are friends and know one another. The next thing is that we show her John and Kevin's pics. She is starting to see we have history with the kids.

She looks at me leans back in her chair and launches into her first argument against such an idea of this which is what do we know about kids this age basically and how will we take care of them, ending with the question "do you feel prepared?"

Game on.

The Holy Spirit reminds me to look her dead on and not at G. but to let him translate as I engage her fully. I explain that we know we are ready for this, that we anticipate that there will be trouble at times but a family always has seasons and that we can just learn to go through things together. G. tells her this, and the next step is that she wants to know "yes but what about their behavior. They may not be good for you all of them. what experience do you have with discipline?" I explain we have had a chance to observe them here in their own surroundings as well as to spend time with them in the hosting program. We are sure that we have had a good sample of their behavior and that we can take on any trouble one step at a time. Still not sold, G. tells that Mark is a Youth Minister. and we both work with lots of kids. (er hum Young Adults) Then she says, well you know as they get older their true nature comes out they can be tricky and you can fall for their personality now but then you will want to put them in foster care and not keep them. What will you do then?

The answer flew out of my mouth, "These are my children, they aren't going anywhere but home with me. We will take care of things as a family together. My God has been very patient with me. I can be very patient with my children."

Game over ~ she leans back in her chair tells G. they are "still her kids" and then looks at me again, puts her glasses back on and begins to write in her book. She is now telling G. that she will do a search to make sure the 3 boys are in fact listed and by Friday we can meet with Zerina our social worker and confirm if they find them and if in fact these are the children that we would like to adopt.

We rise, shake hands and she tells G. "This is a very brave family." If she could have only seen my knees shaking as we were talking a moment ago. The woman was wonderful. She was really looking out not only for the children but for us too. I appreciated her candor, her position even her very intentional opposition to what we had come to talk to her about. I can see why she is the one in her place in the SDA. In the long run however I am thankful mostly for Mama Olya's advice and God's grace in all things.

We went outside to see Paula and Chris they came to say goodbye to the lady who used to work at the place Chris, John and Kevin are from. We talk to them shortly took a picture in the snow outside that I know I look like a babushka in since I had no hat but had put a scarf up around my head b/c by now fashion was out and warmth was in, and then Paula disappeared with Chris, Katya and Lena headed for 21 to say their final goodbye before leaving for home tomorrow. Chris could care less about anything but getting on the plane! He is like, "Tomorrow, bye bye go to America, Yes!"  I am so excited for him and I know Paula is ready to get back to Ande and the kids and get some rest. She has been so good for so long and just really needs a break. She remarked she is ready to just be home and watch her kids and you could see that she is glad that the journey has been successful but is over from this end. She said she will see the boys and as best she can tell them it is ok and we will be there soon. We know they must be wondering what is going on.

We got home and Olya had fixed Dinner and she got tears in her eyes as we told her our story. Mom and Dad called and it was so good to hear from them and to hear that Nana is doing better and should be home soon. I needed to hear from them. To hear your Mom's voice is so much encouragement and to hear your Dad's for me is always that final nod of "it is going to be alright" even just to hear a "hello."

Your comments are awesome. We love you guys and miss you each so much. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for your friendship and prayers!!!! Thank you for the comic relief and our rap song and all of you who are going to check on Rolly Pohlee! I know that they are in good hands with Ms. Peggy but it is always good to get a report from "their church family" too. I miss my puppies but I am so thankful that we are able to be here and have a peace about them being well looked after too.

For the kids in Ms. Williams class ~ Thank you so much for praying for us and for following our journey. I am going to put up a few more pics soon of these pretty dolls they make here. We saw them today at St. Andrews. Ms. Williams can teach you about them. You guys could look on the internet for them and learn more about them! They are mostly imported from Russia here now but some people in Ukraine still make them too. I learned that from a man today at his shop. Be good for Ms. Williams and study hard! :) 

We will rest some tomorrow and tell you what the outcome is on Friday but we are believing they will find all the kids and we will get permission to see Z also and our official permission for John and Kevin too! New prayer is that we will get our papers processed here and get them submitted to the court by next Weds. to petition for a date for court in Kiev.

Love you guys,

Mark and Jenn